We all experience stress at work to varying degrees, even if we don’t always fully acknowledge it. Our work culture is built on the misconception that the more pressure we experience, and the “harder” we work, the more “motivated” we are, and the better our performance and output will be. Tight project deadlines, management methods based on mistrust and control, demanding meeting structures, long working hours that extend beyond official hours into the weekends, and encouraging competition over harmonious co-creation among team members are all shaped by this belief. As a result, many of us are constantly in fight-or-flight mode to cope with this system. Even though we may ignore it, the stress we carry in our mind and body continues to do what it does best in the background: causing physical and mental burnout, until we begin to acknowledge it and learn how to manage our stress.
While we may not have control over the external sources of stress at work, we do have control over our response to them. In fact, this is where our power lies: in our ability to manage and release stress caused by external sources and stay unaffected! Our ability to manage stress directly affects how effectively we lead both our professional and personal lives. Holding stress in our bodies not only can cause physical tension but also limits our problem-solving abilities and creativity, ultimately impacting our work performance.
For me, the importance of stress management became clear after I developed a frozen shoulder due to the extreme stress I experienced during one of my projects. That was when I realized I needed to find better ways to handle stress. The good news is, you can start learning and applying practical methods now, before stress begins to severely affect your body and mind.
My shoulder is now healed, and so is my ability to handle stress! There is one specific technique that I have found highly effective in eliminating stress. I use it for myself and recommend it to my clients. This technique is called “Havening”. I learned Havening during my Certified Hypnotherapist training with Dr. Paul McKenna. It is a psycho-sensory method developed by Dr. Ronald Ruden. The touch used in Havening stimulates Delta waves (associated with the state of deep relaxation), which help neutralize brain receptors that have been activated by past or present traumatic events. While Havening has been highly effective in addressing trauma, such as treating PTSD in veterans, it can also be used anytime to restore calm, eliminate stress, reduce fear, or shift undesired thought patterns. When Havening is combined with certain NLP and hypnosis techniques, it becomes even more powerful.
Here, I share a simple yet effective version of self-havening that you can use even at your workplace to transform the stress caused by your work into peace:
Find a quiet place at work where you will not be distracted.
Close your eyes and cross your arms over your chest, with each hand resting on the opposite shoulder.
Gently begin to move your hands down your arms in a continuous, soothing motion, softly stroking the sides of your arms.
Allow yourself to fully feel the stress and the overwhelming emotions that you are experiencing. Remember, we don’t avoid our feelings; we let our body experience them, acknowledge their message, and then transform them.
When the stress reaches its peak, clear your mind.
As you continue stroking your arms, visualize yourself walking in a peaceful place, such as your favorite nature scene. With each step, count out loud from 1 to 20.
Next, bring to mind a happy or empowering memory, or focus on a loved one. As you do so, count aloud from 1 to 20. Give the happiness a color, and imagine it spreading across your body, from head to toe. Visualize this color moving through each part of your body, your head, face, shoulders, chest, abdomen, legs, and feet. Let the color surround you with its warmth.
Now, hold your hands in front of you. In one hand, place the overwhelming thoughts; in the other, place peace, calm, comfort, hope, and safety.
Bring your attention above your head, and experience the two emotions in your hands together: The uncomfortable feeling and peace, the uncomfortable feeling and calm, the uncomfortable feeling and comfort, the uncomfortable feeling and hope, the uncomfortable feeling and safety.
When you are ready, open your eyes, feeling calm, centered, grounded and better than before.
I recommend using this simple self-havening technique not only after stressful events at work but also before meetings, interviews, presentations, and exams, or even regularly after returning home from work, to help you feel calm! When we are calm and in a relaxed state, we can better access our natural human abilities and gifts to create a healthier life and career.
If you have any questions about the Havening technique, feel free to DM me on LinkedIn or email me at support@alignedreinvention.com.
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